OU5: Tug‑of‑War with the Monster

Some problems feel like a snarling beast—pulling you into endless mental tug‑of‑war (“Don’t think about that!” … “But what if…?”). Tug‑of‑War with the Monster turns that invisible battle into a vivid metaphor: you picture your mind yanking on a rope against a giant “problem monster.” The more you pull, the harder the monster yanks back. The defusion move? Drop the rope. Research on experiential avoidance shows that relinquishing the struggle—rather than out‑muscling it—reduces physiological arousal and frees energy for valued action.

Goal: Practice once a day for four days, then deploy whenever an intrusive thought hijacks your focus.
Session Length: ≈ 4 min  Debrief: 45‑second body scan + 0–10 “urge to struggle” rating

1. Picture the Rope & Monster

Stand up (or sit tall) and imagine a thick rope connecting you to a huge, looming creature that represents your struggle—your “Anxiety Monster.”

Example: You see a scaly, jeering beast gripping the other end, feet dug in, tugging hard.

Quick tip: Hold a real towel or jump rope. Giving your muscles something to pull against strengthens the effect.

2. Feel the Strain

Tighten your grip. Lean back. Notice how much energy—physical and mental—you’re pouring into trying not to feel what you feel.

Example: Shoulders ache. Inner monologue says: “Don’t blush! Just stay calm!”

Quick tip: Exaggerate the pull for 5 full seconds. Let yourself feel the cost of struggle.

3. Name the Costs

Silently list what this tug-of-war is costing you—energy, focus, connection, peace.

Example: “I can’t hear the lecture. My neck’s stiff. My heart’s racing.”

Quick tip: Naming the costs helps open the door to letting go.

4. Drop the Rope

On an exhale, unclench your hands—or literally drop the towel or rope. Picture the monster still there, but powerless without your struggle. Turn your attention elsewhere.

Example: You drop the rope. The monster is still yelling, but you face your notebook and start writing a note.

Quick tip: Add a slow shoulder roll or breath to help your body register, “Struggle off.”

5. Re‑Orient to Values

Ask yourself: “Now that my hands are free, what small move could I take that honors my values?” Then do it—within 60 seconds.

Example: Value = Learning → You jot one question for the teacher. That’s enough.

Quick tip: Small actions beat perfect ones. One step locks in the shift.

I can’t visualize a monster. Can I still do it?

Yes. Use any symbol: a brick wall, a heavy door, even text (“ANXIETY”) on a screen. The key is the felt effort—then the release.

What if dropping the rope feels like giving up?

Notice that thought—and imagine placing it on the rope before letting go. Dropping isn’t surrender; it’s choosing where your energy goes.

Should I literally stand each time?

Standing plus rope amplifies the metaphor, but a seated micro‑version works in meetings: tense fists → relax → refocus.

How does this differ from distraction?

Distraction pushes thoughts away; dropping the rope allows them but stops fighting. The monster can stay while you move toward values.

If you have any behavioral health questions or concerns, please talk to your healthcare or mental health care provider. This article is supported by peer-reviewed research and information drawn from behavioral health societies and governmental agencies. However, it is not a substitute for professional behavioral health advice, diagnosis, or treatment.